DKCU Nation, brace yourselves. We’ve landed a signing so monumental, so groundbreaking, that we had to double-check if it was even legal (jury’s still out).
DKCU Signs Josephus for the 2025 season, bringing his unique talents from the School of Hard Knocks straight to DeKalb County. Hailing from the legendary town of Soggy Biscuit, Josephus has honed his skills on the bench—and trust us, he’s bringing experience.
About Josephus
🟢 Position: Benched
🟡 Hometown: Soggy Biscuit
🟢 College: School of Hard Knocks
🟡 Previous Club: Union Dubuque (before… let’s just say “circumstances” led to a departure)
When asked Why DKCU? Josephus simply responded: "I am banned from all recreation grounds within 400 miles of Soggy Biscuit." We respect the hustle.
His biggest childhood dream? A wash.
His next bucket list item? A bucket.
His ultimate life philosophy? Evading capture.
What to Expect?
Will he see the field? Unlikely.
Will he bring chaos? Absolutely.
Will we regret this signing? Also absolutely.
Josephus, welcome to DKCU. We’ve got a feeling this season is going to be wild.
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